I must, I must ,I must, I must increase my bust!?

That was a phrase that I chanted back in middle school while my arms were locked across each other as I was squeezing my arms...where the hell did it come from you ask, I have no idea. It was probably something my older brothers encouraged me to say in hopes of enlarging my "breast buds." That is what they referred to them as. I guess because they hadn't blossomed into "real" breasts yet. One of the 101 reasons it was so awesome having 2 older brothers...(sarcasm). I'm not sure what was better their endless unwanted comments about my body, or them holding me down trying to put snuff in my lip...sorry I didn't mean to get off topic.
Anyway, I remember going to Wal-Mart when I was about 10 years old with my mom and picking out my first bra(s), one was pink and the other one was blue. They were training bras (no under wire or anything fancy), and I thought they were wonderful. I was so excited about wearing them! Fast forward to high school when I reached first base and my boyfriend caressed my breast. I thought it was so exciting. Even though I was barely an A cup...it was the excitement of the whole thing. I have never been much larger than an A cup. During the end of high school through my college years I was a full B (but that's because I was about 40 pounds heavier than I am now, so obviously some of that weight stuck around in my chest area). Even when my milk came in I was a large B (maybe a small small C) Since then I have lost weight, breast fed 2 children (for a combination of 12 months) and lost even more weight...now I have sockets, empty bags where my breasts were and should be now. There are a few benefits of having no breasts. When I was 10 it was exciting to wear a bra, now that I am 29 that's the first thing that comes off when I get home from work (and somethings I don't even wear one..shhh) I'm only half kidding. I don't wear one when "it's included" in my outfit, you know the built in camis for example. Ok, so not having to wear a bra is a pro...even when I run I don't need one, not sure if that is a good practice, but regardless it's still a pro in my book.
And that's the only pro I can think of. A friend of mine texted me a picture of her breasts the other day (sounds weird when I write that, but she's one of my bffs and I literally laughed out loud). My reply was "hold on and I'll text you a picture of my nipples.) Yes, I look like a 12 year old boy when I lift up my arms. It's not exciting to have them caressed anymore because a year ago Mia was sucking on them for hours a day. Since my breasts have fed children it's hard to think about them pre-baby, pre-nourishment. Hopefully other women reading this can relate.
So, what am I suppose to do? Be thankful that I'm saving all this money because I don't have to buy bras, or invest in a chest? I don't want anything extravagant, large B maybe. I just want more than nipples. Jorge says if I am going to get implants, then I need to really get implants...typical man. I don't think Pamela Anderson's breasts would look normal on my frame, and I don't want them banging me in the head when I run. What do you think? Is it a must to increase my bust?

Running Girl

Ahhh vacation, I finally get to catch up on my blogging. This entry is not only about running, it's about dedication. About 2 months after Mia was born I took up running. I had never ran a day in my life...well I tried out for 8th grade track (800 meter), but my knocked knees didn't get me too far and I didn't even last the entire season.
People always tell me I walk fast, "mall walker" fast, (okay maybe faster than that). A friend of mine at work even calls me Speedy Gonzales, but I couldn't run half a mile to save my life. Here I am over a year later and I have ran 5ks, 10ks and I just ran 10.5 miles last weekend in preparation for my first half marathon next month!! I couldn't believe it, I didn't stop once. My legs felt like jello afterward, and I still feel like I have been hit by a mac truck, but I did it!!! When will my legs stop being so sore from it...I wonder.
Running is my me time. I didn't even know what "me" time was until I had children. Every minute of every day was me time. I could start drinking happy hour with friends at 3:30, I could take a 2 hour nap on the weekend if I wanted too, I could shop (and not just online). Now, I can't even go to the restroom without Hudson asking me what I am doing, and Mia standing there watching me. When I run I jam out to some Ke$ha just loudly enough so I can still hear my feet hitting the pavement and all of my endless thoughts running through my mind. I can run off those greasy beef enchiladas and chips and salsa and not feel so guilty about eating some more the next day.
I wish I would have picked up this habit before I was 29 years, but like they say, "better late than never." I don't know how long I will continue to run. But it is addicting, and I love to eat. So I have a feeling I will be a running girl for awhile.